Sally Boyd interviewed by Sandie Keetch
(From Christian Herald – 29 June 2003)

Caring for the Carers

At the age of four, Sallie Boyd cared for her younger brother – born with a hole in the heart – and later nursed her mother during cancer. The early lesson in caring was to be the launch pad for a thriving ministry offering support to youngsters who look after ailing family members. 

Four years ago Sallie crusaded for a care centre near her Norwich home. Now the Connect Club has mushroomed, with four different groups caring for up to 75 children aged four to 17. 

Today, Sallie, a mother of six, is also disabled with two special needs’ children. But following in their mum’s footsteps, offspring Connie and Keith juggle homework with domestic chores and care of four younger siblings. Such dedication has won the teenagers various awards.   

“As a former young carer I was aware of not putting the same pressures on Connie,” said Sallie, who suffers from ME, arthritis and a circulation problem in her wrists. 

She has seen many children suffering from stress as carers, though the Connect Club also offers help for siblings who are neither sick nor carers themselves. Sallie explained: “Parents often tell us they are aware that other siblings are pushed to one side without sufficient attention, and the ability to pursue normal activities because of the hectic demands from a sick child.” 

She said that Christian love, faith and prayer helps rebuild depleted lives as difficulties are shared in a relaxing environment. Sallie, who is helped by fellow members of City Christian Centre, adds: “It has been clear that God’s hand has been on the work as further support groups have evolved and children and adults alike commit their lives to God. 

“God has given us the ability to deal with these fragile, delicate lives which are so easily shattered, and it is a privilege to build their trust and confidence. We are a bridge between authorities, schools and the family.”  

Sallie has wanted to make a difference since those early days of seeing her younger brother struggling with hospital visits, missed lessons and bullying as he was always small and weak for his age. “He would go blue and pass out and although there were just 17 months between us, people thought we were mother and song because I was a big, strong, tough girl”. 

At 11, the demands increased as her mother began a battle against cancer. Her father died when she was young and her step-father worked long hours. Pressures disrupted school attendance and she was forced to leave. She matured far beyond her years but was alienated from those of her own age. 

“At 15 I ran away from home and my Nanny – my friend and confidante – died. I went off-track and I had no peace until I went back to church.”  

She describes her faith as an “anchor” during those wilderness years.  “I would never have got through as a young carer otherwise. There were no support agencies and groups then. You do not fit in and no-one can identify with the pain and loneliness that engulfs you. People don’t see you as out of the ordinary, but young carers are different – mature, sensitive, always bullied and often they are given more than they can cope with. Now I realise how hurtful my mum found her situation but her courage, strength and trust in God was embedded in me.” 

Her own children became Christians some years ago and they now minister to many Muslim youngsters at school but Sallie does not evangelise at Connect. “If we are asked about our faith we respond but we will not push our beliefs at people. We want to show Jesus through our lifestyle.” 

The impact of a “different” way of life has been seen in many ways, including one occasion when a father of three called at Sallie’s house to say he was going to throw himself from a multi-storey car park. Confused and desperate, he asked for God’s help. “He had been on drugs for 28 years and was seeking rehabilitation,” said Sallie.

“Now his children attend church, he is baptised and he offers hope to addicts on the street. There has been a miraculous difference.”